I've been meaning to rant about this for a while...and a lunchtime stop at my favorite store prompted me to get on the stick and do it. Here goes:
Housewives, Stay-at-home moms, old retired people, people who have the day off...stay the hell out of stores during lunchtime!!!!! (yes, it warranted 5 exclamation points)
Mommies dearest, I know you miss the comraderie of adults and conversation that doesn't include the words poo poo and sippy cup, but that's just tough. When you drag your crabby brat through the produce section it disturbs my ability to pick out a good head of broccoli. And, more importantly, YOU DON'T NEED TO BE THERE AT THAT TIME. You can go in the morning, in the mid morning, in the mid afternoon...well, you get my drift. So if you really want adult company, put your kid in daycare and get your ass to work.
Old retired people, you are just the worst. Not only do you walk too slow and hog the entire aisle, you want to engage every freaking salesperson, meat counter guy and stock boy in tedious, boring conversation. I don't care that you eat prunes to stay regular and neither does Joe...what Joe needs to care about is slicing my turkey paper thin so I can get back to work!
People who have the day off and still can't find anything better to do than go shopping when the rest of the working world is trying to knock one more thing off their list: you're just too pathetic for words. Go back to work, leisure time is wasted on you.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
My Upcoming Southeast Michigan Staycation.
At my company, once you hit that 20-year milestone, you get a four week sabbatical. I hit that mark this July. And wouldn't you figure, now that I have the time, I don't have the money to go anywhere.
So I guess I'm taking a "staycation." Stupid name, but it fits. I live in Detroit (well, a suburb of, but a close suburb, so cut me some slack.) so there are lots of things to do, and lord knows the city needs my money. Kwame stole or spent or wasted a LOT of it over the past several years.
I'm going to head to the DIA (haven't been there since its fabulous renovation), the Detroit Historical Museum, the Detroit Science Center, Pewabic Pottery, the usual suspects. I used to live in Midtown, near the Fisher Building (which is a cool place to visit and shop, too), so Detroit is not a foreign, scary place to me (except when you have to go grocery shopping...homeless people in grocery stores have no concept of personal space). Sometimes it's fun just to drive through Indian Village--I would love to live in one of those old mansions, but the heating bills alone would put me in the poorhouse.
Not sure if Fort Wayne is still open; I'll check. Grosse Isle already has all the wealthy downriver rats; no need to go there right now. But Trenton's Elizabeth Park is really beautiful, so I'll meander over there for a spell. They have a brand new skate park (it's for trick skating, I will NOT be doing that) and on weekends, pony rides. And the Romulus Athletic Center is a really nice place to work out--lots of stone and glass and earthtones, with state of the art equipment and a fabulous poolscape and rock climbing wall.
But I will also wander south to Toledo, (I know, it's Ohio, but they're hurting, too) to see the school bus races at the Toledo Speedway, and perhaps the trailer races at Flatrock Speedway, too. I hear great things about the Libbey Glass outlet and I haven't been to COSI since my kids were little. (I guess that will have to wait...when I went to hyperlink this, I realized it was closed due to restructuring and will open in Fall 2009...maybe. Sigh.)
Cabela's is doing fine without me and my money, but downtown Monroe (home of the River Raisin battlefield, no less!) could probably use a little cash infusion. And my hometown, Dearborn, does have a wonderful theater...granted the entertainment is strictly D list, but sometimes it's campy fun. And the nature trail that starts at Andiamo's and heads into Hines Park past Henry Ford's Fairlane Estate is my favorite running route...I've come upon deer and that's really cool.
Just writing this has made me feel better about living in Michigan and I didn't even mention the Great Lakes.
Be proud, Michiganders!
So I guess I'm taking a "staycation." Stupid name, but it fits. I live in Detroit (well, a suburb of, but a close suburb, so cut me some slack.) so there are lots of things to do, and lord knows the city needs my money. Kwame stole or spent or wasted a LOT of it over the past several years.
I'm going to head to the DIA (haven't been there since its fabulous renovation), the Detroit Historical Museum, the Detroit Science Center, Pewabic Pottery, the usual suspects. I used to live in Midtown, near the Fisher Building (which is a cool place to visit and shop, too), so Detroit is not a foreign, scary place to me (except when you have to go grocery shopping...homeless people in grocery stores have no concept of personal space). Sometimes it's fun just to drive through Indian Village--I would love to live in one of those old mansions, but the heating bills alone would put me in the poorhouse.
Not sure if Fort Wayne is still open; I'll check. Grosse Isle already has all the wealthy downriver rats; no need to go there right now. But Trenton's Elizabeth Park is really beautiful, so I'll meander over there for a spell. They have a brand new skate park (it's for trick skating, I will NOT be doing that) and on weekends, pony rides. And the Romulus Athletic Center is a really nice place to work out--lots of stone and glass and earthtones, with state of the art equipment and a fabulous poolscape and rock climbing wall.
But I will also wander south to Toledo, (I know, it's Ohio, but they're hurting, too) to see the school bus races at the Toledo Speedway, and perhaps the trailer races at Flatrock Speedway, too. I hear great things about the Libbey Glass outlet and I haven't been to COSI since my kids were little. (I guess that will have to wait...when I went to hyperlink this, I realized it was closed due to restructuring and will open in Fall 2009...maybe. Sigh.)
Cabela's is doing fine without me and my money, but downtown Monroe (home of the River Raisin battlefield, no less!) could probably use a little cash infusion. And my hometown, Dearborn, does have a wonderful theater...granted the entertainment is strictly D list, but sometimes it's campy fun. And the nature trail that starts at Andiamo's and heads into Hines Park past Henry Ford's Fairlane Estate is my favorite running route...I've come upon deer and that's really cool.
Just writing this has made me feel better about living in Michigan and I didn't even mention the Great Lakes.
Be proud, Michiganders!
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